Hello Friends,
And happy Monday!
I stumbled upon a fascinating youtube channel this week, called The School of Life.
There, Alain de Botton, a Swiss-British philosopher, talks brilliantly about relationships and life.
Relationship advice is a bit outside the scope of this newsletter (but I still strongly recommend listening to him).
However, duty, life goals and happiness are 100% in scope.
His point reminded me of Achilles, being given the choice between {an early death + eternal glory} vs. {a long but anonymous life}.
It feels like many of us are facing a similar choice, minus the eternal glory.
I summarized his key points for you, really worth a thought.
The Dangers Of Being Dutiful 5min
We start off in life being very interested in pleasure and fun.
In our earliest years, we do little but hunt out situations that will amuse us, pursuing our hedonistic goals all of a sudden at the age of 5 or 6, we are introduced to a terrifying new reality: the Rule of Duty.
Questions of what we actually enjoy doing, what gives us pleasure, still occasionally matter in childhood, but only a bit. They become matters increasingly set aside from the day-to-day world of study, reserved for holidays and weekends. A basic distinction takes hold: pleasure is for hobbies, pain is for work.
The thought of death may usefully detach us from prevailing fears of what others think.
The prospect of the end reminds us of an imperative higher still than a duty to society: a duty to ourselves, to our talents, to our interests and our passions.
The death-bed point of view can spur us to perceive the hidden recklessness and danger within the sensible dutiful path.
How to Figure Out What You Really Want 19min
Do a self-audit - Where are you holding yourself captive?
Follow your freedom, what feels good
Engage - Decide to make a "you"-turn
The decision to get out of fear + reconnect with yourself
How To Simplify Your Life 7min
We refuse to take seriously how much of our babyhood is left inside our adult selves - and therefore, how much care we have to take to keep things simple and very very calm.
“Today as always, men fall into two groups: slaves and free men. Whoever does not have two-thirds of his day for himself, is a slave, whatever he may be: a statesman, a businessman, an official, or a scholar.”
- Friedrich NietzscheWe need to recognise that what is physically possible for us to achieve in a day is not, for that matter, psychologically wise or plausible. It may well be feasible to nip over to a foreign capital or two in a day and run a company alongside managing a household but nor should we be surprised if such routines ultimately contribute to a breakdown.
Insomnia and anxiety are the mind’s revenge for all the thoughts we refuse to have consciously in the day.
In order to be able to find rest, we need to carve off chunks of time where we have nothing to do other than lie in bed with a pad and paper in order to think.
We need to consider three topics in particular:
What is making me anxious?
Who has caused me pain and how?
What is exciting me?
We need to sift through the chaotic contents of our minds.
Every hour of living requires at least ten minutes of sifting.
Thanks for reading, and have a self-reflective week ahead,
V